10 Self-Care Ideas that you DO have time to do!

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Hi There!

I read an blog a couple of months ago about how parents and caretakers respond when someone tells them to “remember to take care of yourself!” This well meaning advice is sometimes one of the most frustrating things to hear as it suggests that I just add that right on my to do list. You know, that one in my head that is spinning around and screaming that I’ll never actually get all of this done . . . yeah, that one.

Then, if I go ahead and pile that on the list, I have to figure out what that looks like and how to fit it into my schedule which is already super hectic . . . and I likely look like I’m overwhelmed and tired, BECAUSE I AM!

“You have to put your own oxygen mask first, right?”

“You have to take care of yourself so that you can take care of everyone else.”

“Make sure you make some time to take care of yourself.”

Even on the internet I find my newsfeed full of memes about self care, like this one from “Your Choice Nutrition”.

When I look frazzled and my hair is a mess and there are bags under my eyes and I’m just barely hanging on, someone feels the need to remind me to take care of myself.

I have heard all of these things and I suspect many of you have as well. I know that self-care is important, I get it . . . but seriously where does it fit in!

Do you know how long my to do list is? How many things on it are non-negotiable? The sheer will power it takes to finish what MUST be done today? So, let’s just add in “get a massage”, “take a walk”, “read a book”, “hang out with friends” or “eat a healthy meal” cause none of that takes time, effort, planning, scheduling, or just plain MORE from me. Sometimes self care is a just another chore on the list.

So, in order to “take care of myself” despite a total lack of time and honestly desire to add more stuff to my to do list, I have come up with 15 things I can do without much if any additional planning or even time and I hope that you will take a look at my list and then comment with some EASY self-care things you have on your list too!

#1 – Write down the list. Wait, that sounds like having to do something! I know, but for some reason, getting the lists out of my swirling head is one of my favorite self-care items because it’s easier to get things done if they aren’t actually doing a jig in my head. So,make a to do list of 5 of the things on the list in your head. The 5 you are going to do today. Then, check them off! Whether that is in an app like Todoist, your google calendar tasks, or a piece of paper, write them down and cross them off. This can be really helpful if you are feeling overwhelmed because you can SEE you are accomplishing things! (P.S. They stop screaming at you after you check them off the list, it’s kind of awesome! I personally like Todoist because I can set up repeating things and put the items in different categories, etc. The organization of it and not having to remember to do repeating tasks makes me feel more in control of an out of control world.)

#2 – Listen to a song that makes you smile, sing, or dance. Is this in your car as you drive? From your phone as you cook the kids dinner? On your headphones in a waiting room at the doctor’s office? Do it! Music is really emotional for me – happy, sad, nostalgic – so you have to pick a song that is simply happy for you. A good one in my experience is “Happy”. My daughter and I sometimes blast this really loud as we drive and we sing and chair dance and “clap along” as possible. Sometimes this helps to break me out of my head and easy a bit of the stress that piles up in there.

#3 – Listen to positive affirmations. You can do this while you shower, while you drive, while you sit in a doctors waiting room (with earphones, hopefully). These affirmations can be anything but I usually try to pick something that I am trying to work on in myself. While on the way to a job interview I listed to self-confidence affirmations for example. And you have to drive or shower sometime – it won’t take any longer to do either of those things while trying to help your brain remember that you are awesome! I found an audiobook called “101 Daily Thoughts and Affirmations to Create Positive Change” that I really like to get refocused.

#4 This one is a bit connected to the last, but it’s important so I’m breaking it out. In addition to listening to positive affirmations, take the positive affirmations that you need to hear the most (3-5 of them) and write them down. Put them on sticky notes and stick them to your mirror or your refrigerator or your bedroom door, somewhere that you will see them every day. When you see them, say them out loud! I usually pick the ones I am the most uncomfortable with as those are probably the areas I need to think about the most to keep on growing.

#5 – Choose a drink you like – coffee, peppermint tea, iced tea, whatever. Put it in a mug/glass you like. Close your eyes and breathe it in before you take the first sip. You might not get to drink the whole thing in relaxation, but you can take that first sip and enjoy the sensory experience. The important thing here is to NOT rush through that sip but to savor it and take the briefest moment to experience something you enjoy. Then you can go back to running around and helping everyone else get everything else done and they won’t even notice that you checked out for a momentary self-care break.

#6 – As you commute or drive to that doctors appointment, work, meeting, or whatever, listen to something that makes you laugh. My first go to is a fun, lighthearted audiobook, (anything by Molly Harper works for me) but running a very close second is an app called Drivetime where I play random trivia. The trivia is funny and engaging and silly and sometimes I learn new random facts to impress my kids with! Sometimes I even play with my 15 and 10 year old and they know some of the questions I have no idea about. It is fun and you can pause the game and come back after that appointment while you are heading home with no harm done! Give it a try and feel free to send me a friend request and we can go up against one another!

#7 – This one is my favorite and the one I forget to do the most. Get outside! Preferably barefoot in the grass if it’s warm enough. Check your senses and take a few deep breaths. Yep, that’s it, just take a moment and stand there and breathe. Maybe listen to the birds if there are any or smell the fresh cut grass or listen to kids playing but just be there and breathe and don’t think about anything else . . . for at least 30 seconds but longer than that if you can!

#8 – Join a group of some kind. Online, in person, whatever! Whether that is one like the ones I belong to: Ferocious Fighters parents groups, Special Needs parenting groups, and one that is just for women who live in the same town. Finding your tribe might take a few minutes but sometimes having that group of people who shares a struggle or understands the challenges you are dealing with can be invaluable when you just need to vent or get feedback when you are facing something challenging. Venting is a very healthy thing to do as long as you vent it and then figure out what your next step is. Don’t get stuck in venting, it can be toxic but sometimes the toxin has to come out to allow you to move to your next positive!

#9 – Identify a smell that you like and find a product with that scent and carry it in your bag. If roses make you think of that perfume that you wore in high school that always seemed to bring you good luck or lavender is a scent that reminds you to relax or lilacs remind you of springtimes as a kid. Whatever that scent is that makes you smile, find it and carry it with you. When you are feeling stressed or overwhelmed, just spritz or apply a little and take a moment to take a deep inhale of the scent to break that cycle of thoughts and reset. This is basic aromatherapy but you don’t have to have fancy oils or products, a good hand lotion can serve two purposes here!

#10 – As you go to sleep at night, listen to a guided meditation to combat sprinting thoughts. I have an app called “RelaxMelodies” where I was able to create my own relaxing background sounds – my favorite is a mix of Ocean, Eternity, and Campfire, just in case you wanted a place to start. I have listened to all of the meditations but the one I like to return to is the “5 Nights of Gratitude” series. There is even one night of that series where it is supposedly teaching me to be grateful for challenging times . . . I don’t know what it says cause honestly I fall asleep but I may have that one on repeat at this point of my life.

I know some of these are pretty simple and honestly, that’s the point. Self-care doesn’t have to be finding the time to get a massage, a weekend away with the girls, or other big events that require planning, babysitters, and money. Sometimes a moment with my feet in the grass, stopping for a minute to watch a sunset over the mountains, or having a dance party in the car with my kids is my self-care for the day and the days when I remember that those small moments ARE self-care are so much better cause I know I am getting that little to do list item in too.

Sending you tons of gentle hugs and love! Don’t forget to comment and tell me your quick self-care tricks!

Love Always, Meg